Friday, February 4, 2022

Dinner Time is Always Messy


     Feeding my children is one of the most difficult tasks I have on a daily basis.  Feeding them three meals a day and snacks makes this one job seem almost impossible.  I have three very different girls with three very different tastes.  Somedays I feel more like a short order cook than a Mom.  Everyday I hear things like "That looks disgusting." or "I can't eat this." or the most common one "EW GROSS!"  Finding something that all my children are extremely happy with is not something that bothers me anymore.  As far as I am concerned I am not here to cater to my girls' extreme tastes.  If that was my ultimate goal it would consume all of my time and energy.  There are so many other things that I need and want to do with my life so making five different meals three times a day would be stupid.  Instead I have decided that it is ok for my children to sometimes be upset during meals or even not eat a meal.

     My six year old has control anxiety disorder.  This manifests in many different ways.  One of her control triggers is if her food is touching.  We bought those plates that separate all the food with dividers.  Brilliantly we thought this solved the problem.  However, one day we didn't have a divider plate clean and she had a meltdown.  Once we discussed things with her therapist she informed us that she needs to learn to eat on a plate without dividers.  It is always a tough decision whether to make my girls better humans or make my life easier.  Honestly if her therapist hadn't told us to, we would have tried to always use the divider plates.  Those amazing gadgets made my life way easier.  Now I know that every once in a while I need to give her food on a normal plate.  Every time I remind her to use her breathing.  Every time I remind her that it all mixes together in her stomach.  Every time I remind her that it is all going to be ok.  All this is happening during her screaming and crying while everyone else is trying to eat dinner.  Dinner time is always lovely.

     Occasionally I find a new recipe that looks awesome.  I summon up the courage and energy to take on something new even though it will probably be met with mixed reviews.  It might take me thirty minutes to make a recipe or it might take over an hour.  The reception of new recipes can never be predicted.  Even dinners I am positive will go over well still remain a mystery.  I could make something like hotdogs for dinner.  My girls love hotdogs.  I put the dinner on the table with confidence that we are going to have no fights during dinner tonight and I can eat in peace.  Absurdly my nine year old says "I hate hotdogs."  This kind of blind siding happens more than I would care to admit.  Other times I will make something like Shrimp Scampi with the certainty that none of my kids will even bother to touch their dinner.  Shockingly all of my girls devoured every bite in seconds.  Predicting meals when it comes to kids eating is impossible.  I have decided to stop trying to figure it out and go with the pasta flow. 

      Who made these food rules?  Who decided that it was ok to have pop tarts and cereal for breakfast but not chips?  I have decided to no longer conform to these arbitrary ideas.  If my toddler wants chips for breakfast I will help her open the bag.  If my toddler wants pop tarts for lunch I will put them in the toaster for her.  With all the struggles I have on a daily basis when it comes to feeding my children, why would I put more restrictions on myself.  Our pediatrician once said that a toddler's nutrition should be averaged over a three day period.  If she eats one good meal every three days I am convinced we are winning the war.  I fight a million battles everyday with my strong willed women and making them eat is something that no longer consumes me.  I will try to monitor things to the best of my abilities and occasionally as them what they want to have for dinner.  Although since there are three of them this usually causes a fight too.  So I'll wait for those rainbow moments when everyone is happy with dinner and we get to have a dinner without crying or complaining.  Let's be honest they will eat will they are hungry.

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