I have some amazing mom friends. They get me. They are some of the only people on earth that understand when I tell them my children are jerk faces. My kids are jerk faces but I also love them so intensely that they are perfect. They understand the struggle of wanting to kill someone and die for them at the same time. Metaphorically speaking, obviously. We can talk about being overwhelmed and all the pressures that moms go through. We can talk about problems with our kids, our husbands, and our families. We cry, laugh, and scream together over a multitude of things that are happening in our lives. These amazing people don't care if my house is a mess because they get it. These beautiful mommas don't care if I haven't showered in four days because they get it. These strong women don't care if my kids and I are still in my pajamas at three in the afternoon because they get it. Finding moms friends like these are necessary for my to survival on this parenting road.
Vulnerability with people is a gift that I have always had. It was inherited from my mom. I have always had one of those faces where complete strangers would tell me very intimate things without even realizing it. When I was younger I thought that everyone spoke in this way. It wasn't until after I had kids that I realized that this was actually an incredible gift. I had so many mom friends that were scared to share anything about themselves. I had so many friends raising kids that were nervous to disclose information about their parenting. I had so many mommas I knew that were intimidated to give any details about their lives. My mom friends did not feel that way about me. Most of these feelings were a result of anxiety from previous judgments. From the time that tiny baby is put into our arms we are bombarded with things we should and should not do as moms. We are told the right way and the wrong to be a good mom. Luckily the people that understand this the most are my mom friends that are living some version of this life right along with me.
My husband is my best friend but sometimes he doesn't understand what moms go through on a daily basis. If I take all three of my girls to the grocery store it is always chaos. More often then I would like to admit I get judgment from other store patrons. Usually it is because my two year old is standing in the cart, or my nine year old is playing with toys, or my six year old is eating something before we have paid for it. My mom friends have similar experiences in their own lives so they understand my frustrations and I understand theirs. However, when my husband takes all three girls to the store he receives praise and compliments from the store patrons. Usually things are said like "You are a blessed man." or "You’re doing a great job." or "What a great daddy." We are experiencing this parenting thing differently so my mom friends are a huge part of my life because of our shared experiences in this community.
I love all my mom friends. I am so blessed to have them in my life. I am so blessed to have them in my kids lives. I appreciate every mom friend that I have made along this motherhood journey. Our kids are growing up together and so are we. Good mom friends understand that none of us have this mom thing figured out. Good mom friends understand that we are all doing the best we can. Good mom friends understand that the most important thing is to love our kids fiercely. Sometimes a day spent with my mom friends is better than therapy. Washing my brain while talking to my friends and getting out all my frustrations and worries is essential. Going through this mom journey is extremely difficult and rewarding all at the same time. Finding other moms that understand that is one of the best things about this road we are all on. Come over anytime for coffee or wine or both. Expect my house, my kids, and myself to be messy but we will have the best time.
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